Shoulda putta ring on it.
Monday, January 26, 2009
Thursday, January 22, 2009
More Hair Jewelry!!!!!!!
This freaks me out but I still think you should wear it to work tomorrow:
Then when your boss says, "I'm watching you, Johnson!"
you can say, "AND MY NECK IS WATCHING YOU, HANS!!!!!!"
and your boss will say, "In this economy, you better watch your back, Fritz!"
and you'll say, "IN THIS ECONOMY, I HAVE MADE ALL OF MY ACCESSORIES OUT OF MY OWN HAIR, BOSS!"
That's when the boss will promote the hell out of you.
You may recall that this is not the first, or the last time, hair jewelry has been featured on Pippi Picks (click here for a hairy reminder).
Hair jewelry is one of our nation's treasures.
That and clam chowder.
GO!!
Then when your boss says, "I'm watching you, Johnson!"you can say, "AND MY NECK IS WATCHING YOU, HANS!!!!!!"
and your boss will say, "In this economy, you better watch your back, Fritz!"
and you'll say, "IN THIS ECONOMY, I HAVE MADE ALL OF MY ACCESSORIES OUT OF MY OWN HAIR, BOSS!"
That's when the boss will promote the hell out of you.
You may recall that this is not the first, or the last time, hair jewelry has been featured on Pippi Picks (click here for a hairy reminder).
Hair jewelry is one of our nation's treasures.
That and clam chowder.
GO!!
Monday, January 12, 2009
Pippi Picks Chloe's Cuties
In my recent post about Kat Von D's Kat Von BOOK, I mentioned CHLOE, my TV editress.
Y'all should know that in addition to drinking with me and doing Kat-Nikki role plays, Chloe is also an illustrator who makes buttons, cards, and other object d'cuteness:
These can be found on her website, IT'S A BIRD, BIRD WORLD.
Go!
Give her your money and your jewels!!!!!!!!!!!
Y'all should know that in addition to drinking with me and doing Kat-Nikki role plays, Chloe is also an illustrator who makes buttons, cards, and other object d'cuteness:
These can be found on her website, IT'S A BIRD, BIRD WORLD.Go!Give her your money and your jewels!!!!!!!!!!!
Texas Picks Tie-Suit
Shocking events, friends.
"Anonymous," a Frequent commenter has revealed his/her identity! They are the alias "TEXAS!" Now that I know that the state of Texas is the one that has been commenting here on Pippi Picks, I feel a deep craving for brisket.
MEANWHILE, Texas recommends that we meditate on this Alexander McQueen tie/speedo:
Neither your neck nor your nethers will fall off with this contrap!!!!!!!!!
Now when you swim you won't need to hold your pouch!
"Anonymous," a Frequent commenter has revealed his/her identity! They are the alias "TEXAS!" Now that I know that the state of Texas is the one that has been commenting here on Pippi Picks, I feel a deep craving for brisket.
MEANWHILE, Texas recommends that we meditate on this Alexander McQueen tie/speedo:
Neither your neck nor your nethers will fall off with this contrap!!!!!!!!!Now when you swim you won't need to hold your pouch!
Saturday, January 10, 2009
Kat Von D's Hand Bra
I haven't checked in with my long-standing crush, Kat Von D, lately: 
...although I have been watching her get progressively crazier and more be-eyeshadowed as she tries to out-shaggy her shaggy man, Nikki Sixx.
Nikki is winning on the eyeshadow front:
Without calling me for advice, Kat decided to write a book and I think you should all buy six copies for me when it comes out in January:
There's a great scene in Kat's TV show, LA Ink, that my editress CHLOE pointed out to me. Nikki presents Kat with the forward he wrote for her book and Kat gets so excited that she almost rips Nikki's wigs off. "Baaaaaybeeeeeeee!" says Kat, "ILOVEIT, ILOVEIT!!!!!!!!"
I love you too, Kat, but I wear a lot more eyeshadow than you and Nikki put together. Even my CATS wear eyeshadow. My cats are also covered with tattoos. They're also vegan.
...although I have been watching her get progressively crazier and more be-eyeshadowed as she tries to out-shaggy her shaggy man, Nikki Sixx.Nikki is winning on the eyeshadow front:
Without calling me for advice, Kat decided to write a book and I think you should all buy six copies for me when it comes out in January:There's a great scene in Kat's TV show, LA Ink, that my editress CHLOE pointed out to me. Nikki presents Kat with the forward he wrote for her book and Kat gets so excited that she almost rips Nikki's wigs off. "Baaaaaybeeeeeeee!" says Kat, "ILOVEIT, ILOVEIT!!!!!!!!"I love you too, Kat, but I wear a lot more eyeshadow than you and Nikki put together. Even my CATS wear eyeshadow. My cats are also covered with tattoos. They're also vegan.
Monday, January 5, 2009
Take Off Your Pants!
Take off your pants!
Now, shake your butt!
Now, put these pants on!!!
Now drink some jus d'orange!
Now stop drinking it!
Now put on an eye patch and pretend to be Tom Cruise in Valkyrie!!
Now stop doing that!
Seriously, stop doing that!
Seriously. Stoppppp.
Now, shake your butt!
Now, put these pants on!!!
Now drink some jus d'orange!Now stop drinking it!
Now put on an eye patch and pretend to be Tom Cruise in Valkyrie!!
Now stop doing that!
Seriously, stop doing that!
Seriously. Stoppppp.
Sunday, January 4, 2009
Readers Pick: Irregular Choice
I was so exhausted after sharing that backlog of reader submissions that I had to save this for later: One reader, the "sister" of "Wiper Peeler," recommended irregularchoicestore.co.uk and described it as a "wonderland."
UPDATE: It is, INDEED, a WONDERLAND OF CRAZY. STOP WEARING ALL YOUR PLAIN-ASS SHONKS AND SLIP INTO A PAIR OF CHERRY SHOEZZZ!!!!!
Perhaps splatter boots are more your speed?
These come with built in socks - THANK HE'ANS!!!!!
Don't go to marz without rocket boots!!!!!!!
Don't go anywhere without pink hot dog shoes!!!!!!!!!
Don't go on a sexy dates without these creepy-ass doll booties!!!!!!!!
Don't drive your frickin' car w/out spots driving shoes!!!!!!!!!
There are even tiny crazies for your crazy baby:
When you leave your frickin' house, wear these big shoes:
If your legs try to escape while you're doing errands, you can be all like, "Fuck you, legs! Y'all are strapped in!!!!!!!"
No escape, legs. Try again in 2010, you fuckers.
UPDATE: It is, INDEED, a WONDERLAND OF CRAZY. STOP WEARING ALL YOUR PLAIN-ASS SHONKS AND SLIP INTO A PAIR OF CHERRY SHOEZZZ!!!!!
Perhaps splatter boots are more your speed?These come with built in socks - THANK HE'ANS!!!!!Don't go to marz without rocket boots!!!!!!!Don't go anywhere without pink hot dog shoes!!!!!!!!!
Don't go on a sexy dates without these creepy-ass doll booties!!!!!!!!Don't drive your frickin' car w/out spots driving shoes!!!!!!!!!There are even tiny crazies for your crazy baby:When you leave your frickin' house, wear these big shoes:If your legs try to escape while you're doing errands, you can be all like, "Fuck you, legs! Y'all are strapped in!!!!!!!"No escape, legs. Try again in 2010, you fuckers.
Friday, January 2, 2009
2008 Backlogged Reader Submission EXTRAVEGANZA!
Honies:
I have been receiving so many fabulous reader finds and I have been delinquent about thanking y'all and sharing your gifts with the team.
I now present to you The Pippi Picks 2009 Presentation of the Backlogged Reader Submissions from 2008.
LET'S BEGIN, SPECIAL PUPPIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
My friend COUNT CHOCULA sent me these terrifying Crocs that are both Crocs and... purple sheeps.
One of my two cousins named Jonah (click here to see all the ridiculously cool shit he does for a living) sent me an INCREDIBLE video for The Snuggie AKA the ultimate jammie:
ANONYMOUS came through once again and sent me a link to a designer called Monsoon Saloon that makes crazy circus clothes, capes, puffies, and big sweaters:
Sweatshirt with leather tassels - DUH:
Click here to see this completely fucking crazy site.
MEANWHILE, Haute Hank sent me a link to a site that sells HAIR HATS!!!!!! YES!!!!!!! HAIR HATS 4 EVR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Click here to see HAIR HATZ!
Ever classy, he also sent me a link to Jewelry with John and Jackie (JJJ):
MEANWHILE, "Wiper Peeler" sent me a link to Shoewawa.com, a site having a contest for THE UGLIEST SHOES OF 2009:
Wiper was partial to THESE CAR SHOES:
I was also directed to irregularchoicestore.co.uk but I will have to post that later because I am now EXHAUSTED by all the EMOTIONS I am feeling from looking at car shoes, sheep boots, snuggies, etc.
READERS!!!!! THANK YOU FOR YOUR FINE FINDINGS!!!!!!!!!!!!
STAY VIGILANT!!!!!!!!
STAY HUNGRY!!!!!!!!1
HAPPY NEW YEAR, SPECIAL DUDES AND MA'AMS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11
I have been receiving so many fabulous reader finds and I have been delinquent about thanking y'all and sharing your gifts with the team.
I now present to you The Pippi Picks 2009 Presentation of the Backlogged Reader Submissions from 2008.
LET'S BEGIN, SPECIAL PUPPIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
My friend COUNT CHOCULA sent me these terrifying Crocs that are both Crocs and... purple sheeps.
One of my two cousins named Jonah (click here to see all the ridiculously cool shit he does for a living) sent me an INCREDIBLE video for The Snuggie AKA the ultimate jammie:
ANONYMOUS came through once again and sent me a link to a designer called Monsoon Saloon that makes crazy circus clothes, capes, puffies, and big sweaters:
Sweatshirt with leather tassels - DUH:
Click here to see this completely fucking crazy site.
MEANWHILE, Haute Hank sent me a link to a site that sells HAIR HATS!!!!!! YES!!!!!!! HAIR HATS 4 EVR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Click here to see HAIR HATZ!
Ever classy, he also sent me a link to Jewelry with John and Jackie (JJJ):
MEANWHILE, "Wiper Peeler" sent me a link to Shoewawa.com, a site having a contest for THE UGLIEST SHOES OF 2009:
Wiper was partial to THESE CAR SHOES:I was also directed to irregularchoicestore.co.uk but I will have to post that later because I am now EXHAUSTED by all the EMOTIONS I am feeling from looking at car shoes, sheep boots, snuggies, etc.READERS!!!!! THANK YOU FOR YOUR FINE FINDINGS!!!!!!!!!!!!
STAY VIGILANT!!!!!!!!
STAY HUNGRY!!!!!!!!1
HAPPY NEW YEAR, SPECIAL DUDES AND MA'AMS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11
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