Friday, February 26, 2010

Yah Mo Gonna Spike You

MAN, these rings would really help me out:I know a few people I'd like to spike...

It would be like in cartoon Robin Hood when Prince John gets his butt on a spike and goes, "WHOOOOO!!!!!" all the way up in the air!!

I'd be walking through crowds in NYC and you'd just see people flying up like popcorn as I spiked their butts!!!!

OOO DE LOLLLY!!!!!!!!

Monday, February 15, 2010

Boss Shoes and Pippi's Pet FEEVE

Boss:So boss!
For all you S&M boos out there, now you can beat the snow AND your Valentine in the same shoes!PS:
I have been watching the Olympics and the announcers are doing my PET FEEVE! A Pet Feeve is the opposite of a Pet Peeve: It is a things that is a Pet Favorite.
My Pet Feeve is when people measure things using "Football Fields" instead of miles or feet. FANTASTIC! A true FEEVE of mine!
"Each year, Americans eat 100 billion hot dogs - that's 1,000 football fields of hot dogs!"
and at the Olympics:
"This course is nearly two football fields of treacherous ice!"
"This likable Norwegian has the kind of stroke on the course I'd run five football fields to see."
Or:
"When I won this event in '52, I celebrated by titty-fucking 1,000 women - that's enough boobs to fill nearly six football fields!"

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Snexy Foxy CLAM JAMS! Just in time for V-Day!

Today was a snow day in NYC and to celebrate, my fine coworker, LIZ, emailed me something incredible:
THE HOODIE FOOTIE SNUGGLE SUIT!

I want to start combining all my other clothes, too. Unders + Pajamas + Sandwiches + HAMS = THE HAMMIE SAMMIE UNDER JAM!!!

Until production on Hammie Sammie Under Jams begins, you can buy a Hoodie Footie Snuggle Suit from a website with the best name ever, PAJAMAGRAM.COM.
A JAMMIE VALUE SET!