Wednesday, May 30, 2007

A Fashion Puzzler!

Readers:
I apologize for this impolite delay in my fashion advice. I know that my words of fashion wisdom are like water in the desert: NECESSARY FOR BASIC SURVIVAL.
Readers, even I, Pippi, am currently embroiled in a fashion puzzler.
FRIENDS! COUNTRYFRIENDS! Today I turn to you!
This weekend, I have to attend the following events one right after the other:
1. Work in my cubicle
2. A bachelor party
3. A job interview
4. An elementary school's production of "Shrek"
5. A wedding
6. A funeral
7. 2 long train rides

QUESTION: What outfit can I wear in all seven situations???
My criteria is this: I don't want to have to change my clothes at any point.
ANSWER: I should give up immediately, drink seven beers, and then put on these disturbing shorts:
IN ADDITION, I should wear this ill-fitting shirt
Lastly, I should wear this ghostly necklace:Over the course of the weekend, I think I will avoid showering or brushing my teeth as well. Hopefully, by the time I arrive I the funeral, I will smell and look so terrible that everyone will burst into tears when they see me, thus distracting them from the sad event.
I think this is the perfect plan.

If anyone thinks otherwise, speak quickly! Otherwise, I will go pick out the one pair of underwear that I will commit to from Thursday to Sunday.

1 comment:

kate said...

Those shorts ARE disturbing.

If you were to wear a Shrek costume, you would fit right in at one of the aforementioned events. I'll let you guess which.