Wednesday, December 13, 2006

Jacket Attack

You are wearing boots now, right?? So why are you running around topless like Kate Moss??? Put on a jacket, you chilly fool! As a sequel to the Book of Boots, I present you with the PippiPicks 2006 Jacketacular Fantasy Collection 2006.
I have picked 3 possibilities for your jacket adventure: Big and Dumpy, Little and Swingy, and Puffy Rando.
The PippiPicks Big and Dumpy Collection
There is nothing better than a jacket that makes you look like a bag of laundry.
You can just curl up in the corner at a party and your friends will say, "Shhh!! That big bag is having quiet time!"

Also, the jacket on this little lady on the left is a raincoat.

Nice green, right?

Because this jacket costs $1,085 it should not be bought by anybody but! the little pearly buttons are tres funny. Like a queen said, "Even my raincoat will be fastened with pearls!!" or "I will only eat cakes made out of rubies!" or "My galoshes must be SOLID GOLD!" and her assistant said, "Yes, my queen."

The PippiPicks Little and Swingy
Collection 2006/2007 (in collaboration with PippiPicks 2006 Fantasy Jacketz Collection and P.Anda Wedding Bikinizz Inc. Co.):
If you are a sad sack, you might need your own sad, gray sack to walk around in.

This sack on the left is $720. The sack on the right is $38. I mean, just sayin'.

This has short sleeves so it's not a "real" jacket and won't keep you warm. However, I think if I owned this it would be the kind of thing that I would wear every day and be all like, "Ooh - I'm a waitress at a faux-French cafe," or "I wear those stupid knee boots," or "Ooh - I'm about to go to hear a 'theorist' give a 'reading' at a 'bookstore,' by which I mean I am going to Target."

This is a jean jacket for pussies.

White! A great color for virgins!

The PippiPicks Puffy Rando Collection:
Puffy rando.

Where's your neck?

Flame on, friends! Orange you glad I didn't say "Banana?"


Christopher said...

Thanks, Pippi. I'm going to go curl up in a bag/jacket and have some quiet time.

Adam said...

"Puffy Rando" was my nickname in grade school.

annie said...

I'm fairly sure that Christopher is using the excuse that he's "writing his thesis" to cover up the fact that he spends all day on waiting for a new post. not that i'm upset about the immediate emails informing me that i can now know what to add next to my fashion shrine.