Pippi Picks a Friend

I have received some complaints that I have only been offering my divine guidance to sluts and leaving dicks out in the cold. Wipe your balls on this towel!! Eat a tasty cake! I have picked some shit just for you, mens!!!!

You should know by now that I (Pippi) have excellent taste in ALL THINGS including what you should wear and how often you should party with Panda Anderson (Answer: All days). Meanwhile, my #1 pick in the game of love has come to visit. This A+ Sir is none other than my friend with benefits (#1 benefit is 3-year relationship) who has appeared in a cloud of perfume and diamonds. This man has the punctuality of a fine wine, the instincts of a fierce owl, and the ass of an angel. He is the new Pippi Picks Muse of 2006/07 AKA Slut of WebSpace "The Swim Suit Edition."

To show my inspiration, I have picked out some clothes just for him:
First, I would like him to wear this chunky sweater:
Later, when we go to the theater, he can wear this fancy frock:
Of course, this high-maintenance honey needs me to keep him in furs and horses... and to beautify the well-appointed home I will purchase for him, I have picked out these sneaky prints: This will remind him that he only has all of his furs and jewels because of the money I make playing basketball.Yes, readers, there is a big announcement: A new voice has come to PippiPicks. Starting today, you can submit your fashion queries to Pippi's Boyfriend, too. "Ask Pippi's Boyfriend" will be an occasional column on this A+ blog.
WHAT, OH WHAT, WILL HIS ANSWERS BE?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
CRAP????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WHO????????//
WHY HAS HE COME HERE?????????/
WHY IS HE RUINING EVERYIGTHIOJIO------------ ok. all's well again.